My aunt has her own church. When she was young she was a party gurl in London, England and now she is a head mistress of her own church. She will go on 40 day cleansing fasts to receive the word in a pure manner. One of her church followers is a Texas gazillionaire who bought her a Cadillac. When I was 13 she had a vision that my eyes had to be seen and bought me contact lenses on the gazillionaire's credit card. He leaves one with her at all times so she can concentrate on spreading the word and not worry about income.
I've since reverted back to eyeglasses. If anyone needs to see my eyes they can just ask. I wonder what the purpose of that was? What, according to this vision, were folks supposed to gain by looking at my eyeglass free eyeballs?
That was her calling, to speak in tongues and guide the lost to their shepherd. My calling may or may not be stand up comedy. I have no trouble performing in front of an audience. I'll shed a good portion of my clothing or pull a little June Carter action anytime but this stand up thing is wracking my brain. I've gotta go out there and be funny on purpose, improv style, for money in just two weeks. It's not the same as gettin' tipsy and calling out the character eccentricities of my friends., or of strangers to my friends. Is there a comedy god? A symbol I can hang on a chain around my neck or build an altar to in my home? Something that requires tidy sacrifice, I don't wanna slaughter any goats.