This is a really hard day for me. So much of my identity has been wrapped up in what I am leaving behind and I've no one to discuss this with because it's not a well understood emotion. That's what happens with ego, assaults on it can really hurt but seem foolhardy to the 3rd party.
I'm ending my own era, and era I built toward for a long time and after not even being sure that it was where I wanted to be, here I am in the 12th hour and I feel sick to my stomache and lonely for what really is only a shadow. I have no idea what's to come or if I will be happy, or why this even happened. Trying to trust that the universe is unfolding as it should and that everything happens for a reason.
To look at it all truthfully, change is so necessary and better things will come of it and I have been stagnant in the position, dealing the cards without gusto, but now without the cards in my hands at all...

I've always been an adaptogen by nature, always melded well in my new scenarios, and truthfully, this is as least a compliment, the way the change was thrown on me. I worry what will happen to the ghosts that I leave behind, what name will they call out? What name will they call me by?

So careful walls, as you fall away behind me, remember that I grew something here. Leave some mark for me.
Whatever it was, perhaps it is better in yesterday.